Tag: Counseling

Giving Our Clients What They Need.. .

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There are times that we as therapists lose sight of what our clients need most—a genuine, nonreactive, empathic presence, authentic relationship, supportive change-validation, skill-building, and goal-directed activity.

Too often, mental health workers escalate clients’ distress by asserting too rigid a modality and too rational a mindset for the therapy to be therapeutic. In fact, I find that this principle is true often in marriage, parenting, clinical supervision, and in many other relationships we encounter in our daily lives.

Carl Whitaker argued that therapy should be a complex emotional experience, not “intellectual nagging”(Napier, 1977). We are complex creatures, most effectively engaged at multiple levels of awareness and being. Moments of emotion have ignited wars. We are far from purely rational creatures. The world is not a purely rational place. Why should therapy be?

When our approach with clients is too rigid or too directive, it naturally provokes resistance.

Here are a few tips to decrease resistance and promote a healthy therapeutic relationships with our clients:

● Respect clients’ autonomy: Our clients shoud never feel that we are making a choice or decision for them. They should feel free to make the choices and decisions they feel are best for them. Encourage and promote independence.

● Validate pre-existing strengths, current readiness or motivation to change (even when it may be low), and positive steps already being taken toward therapeutic goals.

● Meet your clients where they are in the process. Encourage them to feel their difficult emotions in the face of unconditional acceptance in order to begin working through them rather than merely talking about them.

Wishing each of you a Productive week!

EMERGE On!

References:

Napier, A. Y. (1977). “Follow-up to divorce labyrinth.” In P. Papp (Ed.), Family therapy: Full-length case studies. New York: Gardner Press.

May is Mental Health Awareness Month…..

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Do You Know Your Tools2Thrive?

While 1 in 5 people will experience a mental illness during their lifetime, everyone faces challenges in life that can impact their mental health. The good news is there are practical tools that everyone can use to improve their mental health and increase resiliency – and there are ways that everyone can be supportive of friends, family, and co-workers who are struggling with life’s challenges or their mental health.

This May is Mental Health Month we are highlighting #Tools2Thrive – what individuals can do daily to prioritize their mental health, build resiliency in the face of trauma and obstacles, support those who are struggling, and work towards a path of recovery.

One of the easiest tools anyone can use is taking a mental health screen at mhascreening.org when they need answers. It’s a quick, free, and private way for people to assess their mental health and recognize signs of mental health problems.

This May, we are also exploring topics that can help you build your own set of #Tools2Thrive – recognizing and owning your feelings; finding the positive after loss; connecting with others; eliminating toxic influences; creating healthy routines; and supporting others – all as ways to boost the mental health and general wellness of you and your loved ones.

When it comes to your feelings, it can be easy to get caught up in your emotions as you’re feeling them. Most people don’t think about what emotions they are dealing with but taking the time to really identify what you’re feeling can help you to better cope with challenging situations. It’s ok to give yourself permission to feel. We also know that life can throw us curveballs – and at some point in our lives we will all experience loss. It may be the end of a relationship, being let go from a job, losing a home, or the death of a loved one. It is natural to go through a grieving process. By looking for opportunity in adversity or finding ways to remember the good things about who or what we’ve lost, we can help ourselves to recover mentally and emotionally.

It also is true that connections and the people around us can help our overall mental health – or hurt it. It’s important to make connections with other people that help enrich our lives and get us through tough times, but it’s equally important to recognize when certain people and situations in life can trigger us to feel bad or engage in destructive behaviors. Identifying the toxic influences in our lives and taking steps to create a new life without them can improve mental and physical health over time. And we know that work, paying bills, cleaning, getting enough sleep, and taking care of children are just some of the things we do each day – and it is easy to be overwhelmed. By creating routines, we can organize our days in such a way that taking care of tasks and ourselves becomes a pattern that makes it easier to get things done without having to think hard about them.

For each of us, the tools we use to keep us mentally healthy will be unique. But we are wanting everyone to know that mental illnesses are real, and recovery is possible. Finding what work for you may not be easy but can be achieved by gradually making small changes and building on those successes. By developing your own #Tools2Thrive, it is possible to find balance between work and play, the ups and downs of life, and physical health and mental health – and set yourself on the path to recovery.

For more information, visit www.mhanational.org/may.

COVID-19 & Distancing: It’s More PHYSICAL than it is SOCIAL!!!!!

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For many, adapting to the this new-normal brought about by the unprecedented coronavirus, also know as COVID-19, has been quite difficult.

We are consistently thinking about and yearning for what use to be our normal lives.

We aren’t as active as we once were, with many confined to their homes unless they are leaving for essential purposes, which includes work, grocery shopping, medical appointments and so forth. But let’s be real even those essential activities seem very isolating given the physical distancing guidelines of six feets (6 fts.).

Notice that I have re-termed the phrase “social” distancing to “PHYSICAL” distancing.

I am sure you are probably wondering why I did such and the explanation is quite simple.

When I hear the term “social” distancing, I immediately cringe because the reality is that while we have to maintain a “physical” distance from our peers and individuals in our community we live in a time where we are still able to interact socially with one another through the use of technology (i.e. Facebook, Instagram, video messaging services, virtual services, etc), . Therefore, we are practicing “PHYSICAL” distancing and not “social” distancing

We, as humans, thrive on social interaction and being able to communicate with others is such a necessity in our lives.

Social interaction is pivotal to individuals, young and old, overall development. Social interaction influences ones physical, emotional, and mental state. More specifically, social interaction has been found to boosted ones mood, reducing their risk for depression, provide sharper mind by giving individual the opportunity to engage in instrumental cognitive processing and reduces ones risk for severe and chronic medical illness.

Althougth COVID-19 has significantly impacted the world, we do not have to allow it to adversely effect how we interact with others.

Yes, it may take some creativity on our behalf and no we may not be able to interact with others how we use to, but what is important and that we can still interact with others.

Send emails…..

Schedule video calls…….

Host virtual get-togethers and even secure/supervised virtual play dates for your children…….

Have conference calls….

Do whatever it takes, within the context of the “physical” distancing to ensure you are still engaging in social interaction with your loved one and friends.

Just because COVID-19 has limited us physically, we should not allow it to limit us socially.

Let’s practice “Physical” distancing while engaging in “Social” interactions!

Self-Care if the Best Care……. A Reminder for Counselors during COVID-19!

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I am sure by now your days and weeks are now running together and you are unsure of how much longer you can endure the new normal we are all trying our best to adjust to.

Our clients have begun experiencing a heightened sense of anxiety and our families seem to not understand exactly why we are having to, for some still go to work, and why others are having to find a quiet place in our homes to so that we can still provide counseling services during this uncertain and chaotic time.

I can only imagine that this all seems to much for even you, the HELPER and EMPHATIC Counselor, can bear; yet, in it all you are handling the intense pressure well.

Today, I wanted to ask you one question…………

How are you taking care of yourself during COVID-19?

Self Care is the Best Care and in these day and weeks SELF-CARE will be paramount to your ability to continue providing the services that you are to your clients, as well as maintain your health and overall well-being.

While it sounds good to say that you are practicing mindfulness or using stress relieving activities, the reality of it is that none of these techniques and/or activities will be beneficial to you if you are not taking good care of yourself.

But isn’t utilizing techniques such as mindfulness and/or engaging in stress relieving activities what taking care of yourself consist of?

Sure it is, to some extent, however, there is more to taking care of yourself that just therapeutic techniques and stress-relieving activities.

Taking care of ourselves, personally and professionally, consist of many aspects of our lives across various domains.

Physical Self-Care involves us making sure that we are getting adequate sleep, eating healthy, and engaging in exercise on a very consistent, or should I say DAILY basis?

Social Self-Care requires us to make sure that we are maintaining healthy and meaningful relationships with others, to include our significant other, children, other family members and our friends. Social Self-Care also requires us to have healthy communication and time spent engaging in activities that would nurture those relationships that are meaningful.

Intellectual Self-Care includes us doing things that will stimulate and fuel our mind/brain, as well as our creativity, to include: reading books, learning something new, drawing, coloring, completing puzzles, etc.

Spiritual Self-Care is about us as individual developing a deeper sense of meaning and understanding, as well as having a connection with the universe.

A-Vocational Self-Care involves us engaging in those leisure activities we enjoy doing, to include: writing poetry, taking a walk, playing video games, gardening, playing basketball, etc.

Emotional Self-Care is how we deal with and manage those unhealthy and uncomfortable emotions that we are experiencing. Emotional Self-Care includes activities that will help you identify, acknowledge, and express your emotions in an healthy manner on a consistent basis.

Economic Self-Care involves how we manage our finances, automobiles (transportation), and homes (living arrangements).

………………………….. and lastly;

Occupational Self-Care involves are ability to enjoy the work that we are doing and establish and maintain a work-home life balance.

Having realized that Self-Care involve so many domains, what we realize is that self-care is not a one size fits all strategy.

Ultimately, your self-care is specific to you as a person and professional and I encourage you to begin developing your a self-care plan today. You don’t have to tackle every area immediately, but rather, I encourage you to identify those areas in which you struggle more often than not and begin identifying activities that you can do so that you are not struggling and begin taking better care of yourself.

When care for yourself, you will find that you are able to doing things more effectively and efficiently.

Schedule time each day to focus on your individual needs and begin making your self-care a priority!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

* Please note that the self-care domains are adapted from Dr. Karla Sapp’s “WHOLE-Self Paradigm of Wellbeing”. For more information or to learn about the “WHOLE-Self Paradigm of Well-Being”, please feel free to contact Dr. Sapp. *

Welcome to U Matter Consulting and Counseling, LLC

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Do you feel like LIFE gets in the way and you are tired of having no energy left at the end of the day? Do you desire to lead a more fulfilled, stable and happier life?  Are you ready to put yourself first and take care of you?  If you have answered yes to any of these questions, then you have come to the right place.

Welcome to U Matter Consulting and Counseling, LLC.

U Matter Consulting and Counseling, LLC, based in Southeast Georgia, is dedicated to providing a wide spectrum of professional consulting and counseling services within the Southeast Georgia community that will empower, enhance, and improve the overall quality of life.

The practice goal is to help individuals gain a new perspective and improved quality of life by addressing the past and present person as well as becoming a community resource addressing mental health and personal growth needs, promoting awareness and prevention through seminars, trainings, and workshops.

The vision of U Matter Consulting and Counseling, LLC is to guide individuals through the process of change, utilizing a collaborative approach so they may experience the life they desire, transforming individuals into their best.

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